Want to know a way to freak an anxious pregnant lady out? After you give her a thorough week twenty ultrasound, leave her in the room with her ultra calm husband for about half an hour or so. My mind went racing through the possibilities. Did the ultrasound technician smile while she gave me the exam? (An indication things went right.) Did she make any concerned noises or linger over a portion of the test? (Why did she have so much trouble finding my baby's unfurled hand?!) Was the doctor gearing up to tell me unpleasant news about my darling little new one? By the time I did talk to the doctor, I was most of the way to throwing up out of pure nerves, only to hear...
"The baby looks great!"
Why couldn't you have just come by, said that, and added, "Do you mind waiting half an hour while I finish up some other stuff?" I don't mind waiting. I can be a patient person when I'm thinking good thoughts. When I'm about to throw up because my fetus is hypothetically damaged, I'm not patient or calm!
In less awesome news, my doctor was concerned by my disinclination to rush about getting myself blood thinners, pointing out that this could kill me at any moment. I'm not saying I'm not going to get blood thinners, but there was no way in hell I was administering them to myself. As my friend and I once discussed, Stacy (in The Baby-Sitters Club books) and her need to give herself a daily injection of insulin were horrifying. In fact, I once read a book in which that was a murder weapon. No lie. I really did. And now I find myself in the position of needing a daily shot, once again, for several months.
Another interesting note is that being of "Advanced Maternal Age" (heh, they totally said that to me) and having a previous blood clots means that I'm going to see the doctor so damned much. I get eight non-stress tests weekly before my delivery! I find it ironic that something called a non-stress test will be giving me so much stress.