Sometimes, when I read mommy blogs, I get dejected. The bloggers don't mean to make me feel that way. Their posts are not full of judgment. They seem sweet and kind and capable. But, I feel dejected. Why? Well, here is a fake sample daily schedule for the mommy bloggers I read.
3.30 AM: Woke up. Got on running shoes. Made kale and strawberry and banana smoothie. Used the strawberries from our most recent strawberry picking trip. (Or, alternatively, if this is a more rural blog, used the strawberries from our garden.)
3:45 AM: Ran six miles.
4:50 AM: After quick shower, sat down at computer to write about 3,000 words of the novel/cookbook/sewing book/DIY book I'm working on.
5:50 AM: Start breakfast for children and husband. The food is from the organic market that pops up every Saturday. It is full of whole grains and fresh fruit. (Or, if more rural, making omelet from eggs I picked up from my hens this morning.)
6:15 AM: Everyone is awake and eating together. We discuss how we hope our day will go.
7:00 AM: Husband is off to work and I spend the morning with my children, home-schooling them and involved in active play with them. We work on our science projects we have going and learn about the planets by building a scale model of the solar system! So much fun. After that, we spend time building pillow forts and pretending to be dragons and knights. I pull out all the costumes I hand-sewed!
10:00 AM: Time to start making lunch. I make sure all the children are aproned and we all work together to make bread for lunch and to make some refrigerator jam with the strawberries that are too ripe! I let them make a mess of the kitchen and I am so happy!
12:00 PM: We all sit down to lunch on a picnic blanket on the grass outside and while I knit a sweater for my children, they play peacefully and happily with each other.
1:00 PM: More homeschooling! We're working on reading and then we go to the local park to do more studying on nature.
2:30 PM: Time to cart my children around to activities. They make me so tired, but I know my children love them and want to participate in them.
5:00 PM: Back home to make dinner. I use one of my pinterest links, but sub out anything that seems unhealthy. Everything tastes good and fresh now that it is summer.
6:00 PM: Dinner outside again and everyone is terrific. We discuss our day and play dinner games.
7:00 PM: All the children quietly do homework and read or play outside within eyesight while my husband and I lovingly discuss our life and our plans for the future as we hold hands and watch the younger children.
8:00 PM: Everyone is in bed besides me and my husband. I start to blog! Time to process photos and post.
9:30 PM: Time to bake a cake for the special birthday tomorrow and maybe sew up some special clothing for my children.
11:00 PM: Bed time!
These people writing these blogs are so genuinely good and involved with their childrens' lives that it makes me sad. Here is a sample daily schedule for me:
7:30 AM: N2 and I are sleeping/nursing and trying to squeeze another few moments of shut eye in. Suddenly, a nude N is laying on the bed next to me kicking the headboard and asking me to put his pajamas back on him. I groggily ask where his pajamas are and he throws them on me. With one arm, so as not to wake N2, I try to finagle them on him and fail. I ask him to bring me a shirt so I can put that on instead. He cries/screams loudly about wanting to wear pajamas and this wakes up N2 who weeps about the end of her morning nursing. She decides now is the ideal time to have a bowel movement that ends up ruining her onesie and sleeper.
8:00 AM: Everyone is dressed and clean, including me. I look inside the fridge to get N a yogurt and realize I forgot to buy yogurt. Captain Crunch it is. Again. He eats it and asks for chocolate milk. I turn on some Go, Diego, Go, so he'll finish it off quietly.
8:25 AM: Go, Diego, Go is over and N is asking what we plan to be doing. I tell him I need to think about it and I check the weather reports and meetups planned. After some time, I decide it is a zoo day. We just have to get everything prepped. Time to feed N2 again. Wait, she needs to get changed again. Throw a load of laundry in and discover I never folded the clothes in the dryer. Do so. Pack diaper bag. Make lunch and pack that. Oh, the cat is throwing up. Clean that up. Change N again because he wants to wear his soccer jersey and is following me around crying about it.
9:30 AM: N2 is down for her first nap. Desperate for sleep, I throw on another Go, Diego, and take a swift 25 minute nap. Best 25 minutes of my life.
10:30 AM: Starting out the door. Really need coffee. Plan trip to Starbucks.
10:45 AM: Finally have N buckled in, the car packed, and N2 in her carseat. Wailing. I think she might be hungry again.
11:15 AM: At Starbucks, N begs for a juice box. I give in and get him that and the shortbread cookies. I get a venti coffee drink and try to drink it as quickly as possible. Getting N and N2 into and out of the car is a large portion of my day. I threaten to leave N at the Starbucks if he doesn't start hurrying along. He ignores me until I start walking out the door which is when he starts to wail. I pretend I have no idea who he is even though he's screaming mommy right at me.
12:00 PM: Get to the zoo. It is packed. Put N2 in the baby bjorn so she can take a second nap of the day. We walk and walk and walk and talk and talk and talk and feed N2 again. I answer questions about trucks approximately fifteen hundred times. All I can think about is my aching back and bulldozers.
3:00 PM: After giant fight to get N into the car, we manage to get heading home. N2 decides she is starving and screams through all the suburb heading traffic home. N asks why she's crying every five minutes and spends the rest of the time discussing either soccer, animals, or trucks.
3:50 PM: Pull into driveway. I rush into house to feed N2. She falls asleep immediately, tired from crying too much. I put N into pajamas for a short nap.
4:15 PM: Clearly N is not meant to nap today. I keep at it. I need that nap!
4:25 PM: N is sleeping! YES!
4:30 PM: N2 wakes up. NO! Oh well, quality time with my daughter, right?
6:00 PM: She falls asleep after a lot of peekaboo, cuddling, and iPhone checking. I nap with her on the couch.
6:20 PM: P walks in and is convinced that all I do all day is nap with children.